This chick on twitter keeps complaining about her punta withdrawls and im just like bish i go everyday
tbh when ever i spell beautiful i literally always said “b e a utiful” in my head cos one of my teachers in elementary school taught us how to sound it out to spell it and i just say that in my head every time i write it
only Hilary Duff would be able to pull of a pre order on a single.. YES A PRE ORDER ON A SINGLE! MY IDOL IS BACK!!!!!!!!
when a hot person who smells good walks past u
*TURNS OFF WIFI* PAY ATTENTION TO ME
Augustus Waters was a self-aggrandizing bastard. But we forgive him. We forgive him not because he had a heart as figuratively good as his literal one sucked, or because he knew more about how to hold a cigarette than any nonsmoker in history, or because he got eighteen years when he should’ve gotten more. (…) Augustus Waters talked so much that he’d interrupt you at his own funeral. And he was pretentious: Sweet Jesus Christ, that kid never took a piss without pondering the abundant metaphorical resonances of human waste production. And he was vain: I do not believe I have ever met a more physically attractive person who was more acutely aware of his own physical attractiveness. But I will say this: When the scientists of the future show up at my house with robot eyes and they tell me to try them on, I will tell the scientists to screw off, because I do not want to see a world without him.’
ppl who constantly radiate bad vibes are so exhausting like how are you always so that way
friend: “i can only bring one friend. wanna go?”